Twilight Parody
by Emmett is a huggable bear-123
Summary: Twilight Parodys! So funni! Read! summary suck but it REALLY good, well i think it is!
1. Thriller

Hey people! This is my new fanfic! Twilight parodys! This chapter is dedicated to Michael Jackson!

R.I.P Michael Jackson!Hope you like! R&R

_**Xoxo**_

_**Emmett is a huggable bear-123**_

I sat on the couch watching TV with Edward.

"Hey guys! I just had the greatest idea ever!" Alice said as she walked into the room. Edward turned to her.

"What?" He asked.

"Let's dance!" She squealed.

"Dance? That's your 'greatest idea ever'?" I asked sarcastically.

"Yeah. Just do it!" She said. "Everyone! Come down here!" Alice called. Everyone was around us.

"What?" Carlisle asked.

"Let's dance!"

"No!

"Nu-uh!

"That's stupid!"

"Um, no."

"No thank-you."

"Yes!" Alice yelled.

"Fine." We all agreed. Alice beamed and snapped her fingers.

Smoke was all around us and when it disappeared there was a cemetery with fog and it looked really creepy. Where are we? I looked over at Edward…who was wearing a red leather outfit! It looked exactly like the one from…Michael Jackson's video 'Thriller'. I looked down on myself. I was wearing denim pants that were rolled up to look like capris, a red shirt and a denim jacket. Everyone else looked like zombies. Oh no. Everyone looked at each other and then looked at Alice. She was smiling; it looked like it hurt.

"Mom?" Renesmee asked me. "What the heck is going on?"

"I think I have an idea." I groaned. Alice laughed. All of a sudden everyone who looked like a zombie walked over to a grave and laid in one.

"Ugh! I look terrible! Alice! You _so _owe me!" Rosalie shrieked. Edward started singing.

Its close to midnight and something evils lurking in the dark  
Under the moonlight you see a sight that almost stops your heart  
You try to scream but terror takes the sound before you make it  
You start to freeze as horror looks you right between the eyes,  
Youre paralyzed

The 'zombies' and Edward started doing the Thriller dance

_**Chorus**__  
cause this is thriller, thriller night  
And no ones gonna save you from the beast about strike  
You know its thriller, thriller night  
Youre fighting for your life inside a killer, thriller tonight_

You hear the door slam and realize theres nowhere left to run  
You feel the cold hand and wonder if youll ever see the sun  
You close your eyes and hope that this is just imagination  
But all the while you hear the creature creepin up behind  
Youre out of time

_**Chorus**__  
cause this is thriller, thriller night  
There aint no second chance against the thing with forty eyes  
You know its thriller, thriller night  
Youre fighting for your life inside of killer, thriller tonight_

Bridge  
Night creatures call  
And the dead start to walk in their masquerade  
Theres no escapin the jaws of the alien this time  
(theyre open wide)  
This is the end of your life

Theyre out to get you, theres demons closing in on every side  
They will possess you unless you change the number on your dial  
Now is the time for you and I to cuddle close together  
All thru the night Ill save you from the terror on the screen,  
Ill make you see  


_**Chorus**__  
That this is thriller, thriller night  
cause I can thrill you more than any ghost would dare to try  
Girl, this is thriller, thriller night  
So let me hold you tight and share a killer, diller, chiller  
Thriller here tonight_

(rap performed by vincent price)  
Darkness falls across the land  
The midnite hour is close at hand  
Creatures crawl in search of blood  
To terrorize yawls neighbourhood  
And whosoever shall be found  
Without the soul for getting down  
Must stand and face the hounds of hell  
And rot inside a corpses shell  
The foulest stench is in the air  
The funk of forty thousand years  
And grizzy ghouls from every tomb  
Are closing in to seal your doom  
And though you fight to stay alive  
Your body starts to shiver  
For no mere mortal can resist  
The evil of the thriller

"Yay!" Alice yelled and snapped her fingers and we were all back to normal in the house. "That was fun, wasn't it?!" She asked us. We all stared at her, shook our heads at her and walked away. "Awww! You know it was fun!" We didn't answer. "Whatever!" She mumbled and went outside.


	2. Jasper and Blood

**Heyyyyyyyy. I was reading ChazziBabes story "how to annoy the twilight characters". She had one on jasper and there was a perfect one that I thought I could make a little thing on it. I asked her and she said I could so here it is! Oh and check out her other stories!**

**Xoxo**

**Emmett is a huggable bear-123**

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**_ BPOV_**

"Bella, Emmett! Come here!" Alice whispered. We followed her.

"What?" Emmett asked.

"I have the plan ever!" She told us. Emmett and I groaned.

"We are _NOT _dancing again." I started walking away but she grabbed my arm and spun me around. She was strong for a pixie. Haha, pixie.

"No, not dancing. A prank!" She squealed.

"What prank? I'll do it!" Emmett said.

"Well. It's a prank on Jasper." She replied.

"Ooh. Emo boy. This outta be fun!" Emmett arched his eyebrow. Yes, eyebrow. Alice shaved his other eyebrow off last week. Looks like he will only have one eyebrow for the rest of his life. Rosalie is pretty freaked.

"I'm listening." Emmett and I listened as she explained.

I laughed at Alice's plan.

"Well?" She asked us

"Yeah. I'll do it!" I laughed again.

"I'm up for any prank." Emmett shrugged.

"Okay, let's set it up! I have everything we need. Emmett go grab a video camera." Alice laughed evilly, like evil professors do. My eyes went wide and I looked from side to side and backed away slowly.

"Imma go…uh…tell Edward our plan. Bye!" I quickly said and ran to find Edward.

_**APOV**_

I set up me and Jasper's room with fake blood all over it and put a sweet smelling perfume all over the room. I set up the video camera and hid it. Emmett, Bella and Edward walked into the room.

"Wow. You got Esme to agree to this?" Edward asked me. Emmett let out a low whistle.

"Actually, she doesn't know." I giggled.

"Are we ready?" Bella asked.

"Yeah. You guys go downstairs. And tell him something to get him up here! I will hide behind the camera. Go!" I pushed them out of the door and hid behind the camera and watched. Jasper walked in and screamed. He screamed a girlie scream.

**JPOV**

I walked up the steps.

"Hey Jazz. Um I-"Edward said to me.

"One sec. I need something form my room." I told him.

"Oh, well, okay. Nevermind then." I walked down the hallway and heard Edward, Bella and Emmett laugh.

I walked into my room and scream. There was blood everywhere and it smelt so good. I screamed again and looked around.

_**APOV**_

I covered my mouth and stifled a giggle. Jasper was looking around frantically and then his eyes locked on the window. He ran to it and ran threw the glass and flung himself out of it.

I heard him it the ground and run for it. I burst out laughing. Everyone came upstairs to see what was wrong.

"What's wrong- oh my goddness!" Esme said and stared at the room. Her eye began to twitch. I was rolling on the floor laughing.

"You…will…see…soon!" I said between laughs.

Five minutes later I composed myself and grabbed the camera and walked down stairs.

"Everyone! Come get comfy!" I yelled. Everyone came in and sat somewhere and then the wolves came in the door.

"What's going on?" Sam asked.

"Just get comfy and enjoy the show!" I smiled evily. I pressed play. They saw everything. When the little clip was done everyone was laughed.

"Hello Youtube!" Jacob said and gave me a high five.

"Ooooohhhh yeah." I said nodding my head up and down.

Jasper walked in.

"Jacob! Go post it on Youtube quick!" I whispered to him and pushed him towards the computer.

Jasper stared at all of us.

"Um, what's going on?" He asked and looked at all of us. We were silent then burst out laughing.

"Jasper! You are paying for that window!" Esme told him and frowned at him.

"How did you know?" He asked her.

"Alice." They all stated.

I turned to them. "Gee, thanks!" I said and looked at Jasper and waved slightly.

"What?" He asked.

"Well, it was a prank. Pretty funny, huh?" I asked and started backing away. Jasper stepped forward.

"Wanna see something funny?!" He walked forward.

"Um, Emmett? A little help here?" I looked at Emmett, who was smiling.

"Nope! You're on your own little sis!" He smiled again and laughed. I shot him a death glare and ran.

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_**I hope you guys like it! **_

_**Xoxo**_

_**Emmett is a huggable bear-123**_


	3. Contest

Hey guys! I decided to have a contest! I wanna see who can write the best fanfic!

Here is the plot!

Edward leaves in new moon. What happens when he is gone? Bella becomes completely different. She starts hanging out with Lauren and dates Mike. Bella ends up dumping Mike and goes out with Jacob.

Okay? And you can do whatever you what.

Prize? You get to be a character in ALL of my stories!

So if you are going to try, just tell me in a review! I know this is very random but I love reading peoples work! AND tell me when you have the first chapter up by sending me a message.

Rules:

No more then 15 chapters

Chapters can be as long as they want.

No shorter then 5 chapters

BE CREATIVE!

Date ends: I don't know.

Good luck!

I'll be reading!

Xoxo

Emmett is a huggable bear-123


	4. Eat it!

_**Hey guys! Thanks to anyone who reviewed!**_

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_**JPOV (yay! Jasper!)**_

"Everyone! Come here! I want to show you guys something!" Emmett called to us. What does he want? I walked downstairs and everyone was down there. Alice was smiling and Edward was frowning.

"Alice!" Emmett said and Alice snapped her fingers and fog was around us. Oh god.

_**BPOV**_

Not again. When he fog was gone there was a new scene. Emmett was on a bed and the setting looked like a motel. I was sitting on a barstool. Edward was wearing a denim jacket. Everyone else was everywhere. Music started playing. Edward got up and came over to me and grabbed my head. It came off when he grabbed it. I gasped.

"Alice! Emmett!! When this is over you guys are going to be dead! OFFICIALLY!!!!!!!!!" I screamed. Emmett started singing.

_"How come you're always such a fussy young man?  
Don't want no Captain Crunch, don't want no Raisin Bran  
Well, don't you know that other kids are starving in Japan  
So eat it, just eat it (prrr)_

_Don't wanna argue, I don't wanna debate  
Don't want to hear about what kind of food you hate ooh  
You won't get no dessert 'till you clean off your plate  
So eat it, don't you tell me you're full_

_Just eat it, eat it , eat it  
Get yourself an egg and beat it  
Have some more chicken, have some more pie  
It doesn't matter , it's broiled or fried  
Just eat it, eat it, eat it, eat it  
eat it, eat it, eat it, eat it, ooh_

_Your table manners are a cryin' shame  
You're playin' with your food like it's some kind of game  
Now, if you starve to death, you'll just have yourself to blame  
So eat it, just eat it (prr)(burp)_

_You better listen, better do what you're told ooh  
You haven't even touched your tuna casserole ooh  
You better chow down or it's gonna get cold  
So eat it_

_I don't care if you're full  
Just eat it, eat it, eat it, eat it  
Open up your mouth and feed it  
Have some more yogurt, have some more spam  
It doesn't matter if it's fresh or canned  
Just eat it, eat it, eat it, eat it  
Don't you make me repeat it  
Have a banana, have a whole bunch  
It doesn't matter what you have for lunch  
Just eat it, eat it, eat it, eat it  
Eat it, eat it, eat it, eat it  
(hoh hoh hoh hoh hoh)_

_Eat it, eat it, eat it, eat it  
If it's gettin' cold, reheat it  
Have a big dinner, have a light snack  
If you don't like it you can't send it back  
Just eat it, eat it, (woohoo) eat it, eat it  
Get yourself an egg and beat it (oh lord)  
Have some more chicken,(woohoo) have some more pie (woohoo)  
It doesn't matter , it's broiled or fried  
Just eat it, eat it, eat it, eat it  
Don't you make me repeat it (oh no)  
Have a banana,(woohoo) have a whole bunch  
It doesn't matter what you had for lunch  
Just eat it, eat it, eat it, eat it"_

Alice snapped her fingers. We were back to normal. How does she do that? My hands flew to my head. It was there. I spun around and glared at Alice and Emmett. My vision was going red because I was so mad.

"Uh. Emmett, Alice, run for your lives. She is pissed!" Edward said.

"EDWARD CULLEN! language!" Esme scolded.

They both ran and I followed them.

**_yeah. i don't know. it just popped in my head. and the song is Eat it- Weird Al Yankovic look it up on youtube and watch the music video n picture emmett singing it. i laughed my head off! i need ideas for my nex chapter!_**

**_Ciao babes_**

**_Emmett is a huggable bear-123  
_**


	5. Authors Note

Hi guys, I some bad news that you won't like. I won't be posting anymore chapters of the storys I already have the rest of this week and next week. Im going to Pennsylvania; Hershey Park, Dorney Park and a Phillies BaseBall game! Yay! But I will be writing so you guys will get a lot when I come back. I a also working on a book that I can publish. I can't find a name for it though. Here is just random things I have put together of it.

_**Okay there is going to be a girl (I don't have a name ye) who has powers. She has one where she can make a shield around and the shield can get hit by anything. It's kinda confusing but when I get some chapters of it , if you review any of my stories you get ONE sneak peek. ONE. And it's not going to be very long. So please wish me luck on publishing it. AND I made my Facebook. So add me there and on Myspace!**_

_**Ok?**_

_**Luv all my reviewers, people who favorited, subscribed and that stuff.**_

_**Ciao babes**_

_**Emmett is a huggable bear-123**_


	6. Chapter 6

I know I said that I wouldn't be writing for the next week but I have and idea for a next story. When I was watching the Hannah Montana episode He Could Be The One when if first showed I had an idea! Mix it with Twilight! So im going to work on that! I have chapters of my other stories ready but I won't post them until I get back, hen u have a whole bunch to read!!!

Ciao until the week after next week babes

Emmett is a huggable bear-123


	7. Authors Note SERIOUSLY READ

**Hey people, my surgery went well to let you know but my throat kills but that's not the point if this author's note.**

**Guess who was fired from **_**Twilight **_**!**

**Rachelle Lefevre (Victoria) **

**She was replaced by Bryce Dallas Howards . Howards will be Victoria in _Eclipse_**

**Lefevre had another movie to film and the parts she is in takes 10 days of filming but for Eclipse it would be three months of filming and Summit Entertainment didn't want to film the scenes she was going to be in before the rest of the movie. BUT they did that for the guy who played James! What is wrong with Summit Entertainment.**

**Rachelle was shocked because they did it without notifying her. She got a call telling her this.**

**Here is what Rachelle said :**

"**I was stunned by Summit's decision to recast the role of Victoria for **_**Eclipse**_**. I was fully committed to the **_**Twilight**_** saga, and to the portrayal of Victoria. I turned down several other film opportunities and, in accordance with my contractual rights, accepted only roles that would involve very short shooting schedules.**

**"My commitment to **_**Barney's Version**_** is only 10 days. Summit picked up my option for **_**Eclipse**_**. Although the production schedule for **_**Eclipse**_** is over three months long, Summit said they had a conflict during those 10 days and would not accommodate me. Given the length of filming for **_**Eclipse**_**, never did I fathom I would lose the role over a 10-day overlap. I was happy with my contract with Summit and was fully prepared to continue to honor it. Summit chose simply to recast the part.**

**"I am greatly saddened that I will not get to complete my portrayal of Victoria for the **_**Twilight**_** audience. This is a story, a theatrical journey and a character that I truly love and about which I am very passionate. I will be forever grateful to the fan support and loyalty I've received since being cast for this role, and I am hurt deeply by Summit's surprising decision to move on without me. I wish the cast and crew of **_**Eclipse**_** only the very best."**

**I don't know about you guys but I am one P.O'ed Twilight fan. I found this information out from a girl on thesims2(dot)com  
**

**She sent me emails if I wanted to get into Summit Entertainment and asked them why and I think I will email them. **

**Are you guys mad? I am.**

**That's my news. :[ sadly.**

**Ciao Babes**

**Emmett is a huggable bear-123**


	8. Author's Note I'm sorry

**Ohkay, I no I have not updated for a while. I'm sorry about that. I'm not going to update this story until my story 'Famous Lies Of Love' is done. Sorry.**

**Until then, you should check out 'Famous Lies Of Love' and review it.**

**Sorry for the inconvenience.**

**CIAO BABES!**

**Emmett is a huggable bear-123 **


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